Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
