Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
