Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
This is classic penis vs brain.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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