I feel like I'm in dance class right now
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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