Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
