taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Randomize