I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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