And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
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