AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
