but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Randomize
