That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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