Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
