brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize