do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
