would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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