Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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