Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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