You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
The power of my boobs compel you
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
