Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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