I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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