Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize