I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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