You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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