R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize