happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
