What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize