I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
