Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
she looked like the before picture.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
