Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
