bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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