hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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