I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
