He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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