As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
