I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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