The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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