I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
