i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize