fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
