Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
