I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
