Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
