I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
