i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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