I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
