is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
