Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
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