I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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