Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
