What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
