I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
