I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
